Archive for the ‘F*&K YOU BRETT FARVE!’ Category

Everyone Should Get a Subscription!

Wednesday, August 26th, 2009

Finally the sports world has something to cheer about. The Latest Sports Illustrated will not feature anything about the soap opera star Brett Favre. SI made a daring decision that seems to slap ESPN right in the face, and everyone enjoys it. ESPN has spent the last four months pandering to the controversies in the world of sports instead of reporting about sports. They have lost a lot of credibility in my mind due to their bias towards controversy instead of sports.

ESPN made a name for themselves as a portal for all the worlds sports, and now it has resorted to a gossip theme to keep the viewers happy.

Unacceptable we want the old ESPN back.

Also no anchors are funny anymore besides Scott Van Pelt

Unfortunately Named Football Plays

Friday, August 21st, 2009

Vick Bulldog Electritiy Sweep left

McNair Air Through His Middle

Shiancoe Swing Down To His Knees

Big Ben Draws Out Too Late

Stallworth Speed Right Too Late Juke

Cutler Needle Right, Sugar Slide

Favre Forgets Play…Then Retires

Brady Bouces Back To Left Knee

Stafford Dive Too Late

Tebow Takes Shiancoe In Deep

The Most Ill-advised . . . Awesomely Inappropriate 2009 Fantasy Football Team Names

Thursday, August 20th, 2009

It’s that time of the year again: fantasy football season. The time of the year when all men shy away from making love to their smoking hot wives and spend more time delving into the depths of sports blogs and football stats. Is this sad? Perhaps. But one thing seems to happen annually to all fantasy lovers: getting stuck in a league you never wanted to be a part of in the first place.

Perhaps it is a work, dorm, or family league . . . either way the fact is you didn’t pay $100 to enter and the only thing on the line is pride. But if all else fails and you have a terrible draft, at least you can fall back on one thing: a clever name.

Here is a list of the best fantasy football team names for the 2009-2010 season:

Steve McNair Names

Steve McNair’s Speedholes

Affair McNair

McNair is My Sleeper Pick

Aired Out McNair

Steve McNair Shotgun Draw

Ghosts of Girlfriend’s Past II – Airholes

 

Mike Vick Names

Mike Vick’s Pitbull Mittens

Mike Vick and the Parole Violatazzz

Vick’s Wildcat Dogfight

Kibbles ‘n’ Vicks

Vick’s 6-ft Underdogs

Ron Mexico & the Itches

Hide Your Beagle, Vick’s an Eagle

Visanthe Shiancoe Names

1st & Visanthe Shiancoe

Visanthe Shankhoes

Visanthe’s Taint Tears

Chad Ochocinco Names

Chad Lost his Johnson

Chad’s MuchoFuckos

Chad Ochocinco Thinks My Team Name’s More Tragic than 9/11

Ochocinco Said he’d Tweet me a Name

Ben Roethlisberger Names

Big Ben’s Ouchy Penis Spot

Andrea McNulty’s TV Repair

Big Ben’s TV Repairman

Donte Stallworth Names

Donte Stallworth’s High Beams

Stallworth Steamrollers

Donte’s Bloody Bentleys

Donte’s Law: Pedestrians are Easier to Catch than Footballs

Donte’s 30 Days & 30 Nights

Jay Cutler Names

Cutlerfucker’s Insulin Dealer

Blood Sugar Sex Cannon

The Diabetic Shockers

4th & Drunk
Brett Farve Names

Farve Dollar Footlong

Farve, Retiring Since 2006

It’s Farve from Over

Farvefromchoosing

FUCKBRETTFARVE!

The BrittFarr Mississippi Drama Queens

Tom Brady Names

Gisele to Pound Town

Brady Left Knee Bounty

Brady’s Unused Condoms

Tom Brady at the Battle of Wounded Knee

Detroit Lions Name

Swim, Swim, Swim

Buoy Lions

Other Names

Ronnie Brown Noise

Wildcat Malt Offense

Forgetting Brandon Marshall

Erin Andrew’s Peephole

Erin Andrew’s Landing Strip

Shockey was Never Conscious Anyways

First Down Syndrome

99 Problems and A-ddai Ain’t One

New Orly Taints

Romo-Sexual

Kardashian Trimmed Some Bush

Backfield Penetration

Eli – The Other White Manning

Black Horse & the Crab Tree

SUNDAY MORNING WOOD!

We’ll Never Forget You . . .

Tuesday, August 4th, 2009

neverforget

A Parting Punch In The Groin Courtesy Of Brett Favre

Wednesday, July 29th, 2009

Packers Favre Football

In a list of the most embarrassing and miserable ends? to a career, Brett Favre has to be on top.

I grew up in the Brett Favre years of the NFL when he was the man, i would pretend to be Favre and throw a football as hard as i could at the fence just like a Favre to Freeman combo. He was my favorite player for the later half of the 90’s and the early new millenium. His freewheelin style just made him seem like everybody, he enjoyed playing the game. He was not out there for the money or the fame but to play the game. He was living every kids dream. BUT THEN HE GOT OLD.

Old age changes people, and when Favre got close to the end he panicked. His admiration for the game made him unable to disconnect, he could not stop. One might think how noble, to want to play forever and help teams win. But reality has to set in at some point, you cannot play forever, with this revelation, I began to hate Brett Favre.

He could have gone out on top. Favre could have been a god in Wisconsin. I won’t go into the whole retirement story because it has been constantly on ESPN for over a year.

With his most recent “commitment” to retiring, brings a whole new speculation of a return. Favre needs to finish this story so i NEVER HAVE TO SEE HIM AGAIN. Sitting on the sidelines is not going to suit Favre and the speculation will return next summer and ruin my life just like it did this summer.

The Vikings, Packers, and Tarvaris Jackson have much more of a reason to hate Favre than I. Brett Favre tooled with the idea of signing with his former teams arch-rival for a whole summer only to say he is not coming back. How must Jackson feel now that he is clearly their second choice and the whole team has been calling Favre begging him to come play. His offensive linemen, the players who are suppose to protect Jackson, were calling Favre daily. The Packers watched their legend go and play for other people and tarnish his legacy with Packer fans. They lost their media darling cash cow.

Brett Favre or Sarah Palin- Who are you more annoyed with?