*And the NC State Hurricanes were born*

06 May 2009

Say, that’s a real nice rink you got there. What’s that you’re playing on? Ice? Well that’s a purdy good playing surface . . . if you’re an Eskimo. Here in North Carolina we play on football fields. Made of 74% grass. And rattle snakes

What’s that stick you got there? A hockey stick? I bet that comes in real handy when you caint get back there to give your boyfriend the reach around. In Stanly County we use sticks to go catfishin’. And to make moonshine. And to poke shit while we’re moonshine catfishin’ while u’re twirlin on ur ice.

Skates? Skates?? I’ve seen them skates before . . . on hair stylists and that Pauly Shore. We don’t need skates in North Carolina . . . the Wolf Pack prowl in bare feet.  I will come in reaaaaaal handy when you’re tryin’ to kill a bear with your own hands in the Appalachians. What, you’ve never done that before? Pansy.

Is that a dip can? No? A puck you say! It’s ROUND? Well oo la la! We don’t like the shape ROUND around these woods. Gets in the way of us doin’ important shit. Like moonshinin’ moonshine and lightin’ shit on fire. What’d you say? Yeah NASCAR tracks are round too! But so is that purdy mouth of yours. I bet those 2 missin’ front teeth will come in reeeeeeal useful when we’re done with ya.

What’s that? You play in the RBC Center? . . . . .

My Wolfpack play there!

I went to . . . .

Yeah, I got a college education . . .

Dude, it was just a joke, I don’t like your mouth . . .

But I didn’t paint that about Obama in the expression tunnel! . . .

Your colors aren’t red and white because ours are?

Can we tell them they are?

The rest of North Carolina.

We’re doing it anyways.

Yeah, I think they’ll be jealous there’s no ice in the Dean Dome . . .

*And the NC State Hurricanes were born*

 

. . . Go Canes!