The Most Ill-advised . . . Awesomely Inappropriate 2009 Fantasy Football Team Names
20 Aug 2009
It’s that time of the year again: fantasy football season. The time of the year when all men shy away from making love to their smoking hot wives and spend more time delving into the depths of sports blogs and football stats. Is this sad? Perhaps. But one thing seems to happen annually to all fantasy lovers: getting stuck in a league you never wanted to be a part of in the first place.
Perhaps it is a work, dorm, or family league . . . either way the fact is you didn’t pay $100 to enter and the only thing on the line is pride. But if all else fails and you have a terrible draft, at least you can fall back on one thing: a clever name.
Here is a list of the best fantasy football team names for the 2009-2010 season:
Steve McNair Names
Steve McNair’s Speedholes
Affair McNair
McNair is My Sleeper Pick
Aired Out McNair
Steve McNair Shotgun Draw
Ghosts of Girlfriend’s Past II – Airholes
Mike Vick Names
Mike Vick’s Pitbull Mittens
Mike Vick and the Parole Violatazzz
Vick’s Wildcat Dogfight
Kibbles ‘n’ Vicks
Vick’s 6-ft Underdogs
Ron Mexico & the Itches
Hide Your Beagle, Vick’s an Eagle
Visanthe Shiancoe Names
1st & Visanthe Shiancoe
Visanthe Shankhoes
Visanthe’s Taint Tears
Chad Ochocinco Names
Chad Lost his Johnson
Chad’s MuchoFuckos
Chad Ochocinco Thinks My Team Name’s More Tragic than 9/11
Ochocinco Said he’d Tweet me a Name
Ben Roethlisberger Names
Big Ben’s Ouchy Penis Spot
Andrea McNulty’s TV Repair
Big Ben’s TV Repairman
Donte Stallworth Names
Donte Stallworth’s High Beams
Stallworth Steamrollers
Donte’s Bloody Bentleys
Donte’s Law: Pedestrians are Easier to Catch than Footballs
Donte’s 30 Days & 30 Nights
Jay Cutler Names
Cutlerfucker’s Insulin Dealer
Blood Sugar Sex Cannon
The Diabetic Shockers
4th & Drunk
Brett Farve Names
Farve Dollar Footlong
Farve, Retiring Since 2006
It’s Farve from Over
Farvefromchoosing
FUCKBRETTFARVE!
The BrittFarr Mississippi Drama Queens
Tom Brady Names
Gisele to Pound Town
Brady Left Knee Bounty
Brady’s Unused Condoms
Tom Brady at the Battle of Wounded Knee
Detroit Lions Name
Swim, Swim, Swim
Buoy Lions
Other Names
Ronnie Brown Noise
Wildcat Malt Offense
Forgetting Brandon Marshall
Erin Andrew’s Peephole
Erin Andrew’s Landing Strip
Shockey was Never Conscious Anyways
First Down Syndrome
99 Problems and A-ddai Ain’t One
New Orly Taints
Romo-Sexual
Kardashian Trimmed Some Bush
Backfield Penetration
Eli – The Other White Manning
Black Horse & the Crab Tree
SUNDAY MORNING WOOD!